Example of an Effective Letter

This post comprises an example of an effective business letter and the reasons it is effective.

Background

The following letter, which is in block format with mixed punctuation, is a response to a problem many readers likely have experienced: receipt of a past-due notice.  When a policy holder receives a past-due notice, he/she often will call or write the underwriter immediately, asking for an explanation.  Certainly the policy holder is afraid he/she will be without insurance only because the underwriter thinks the policy holder has not paid his/her premium.

From the underwriter's perspective, if the policy holder would wait, the firm likely would resolve the discrepancy.  If it did not receive the policy holder's payment, the firm sends a legal notice that serves as a third chance to pay the premium.  The firm is forced to cancel the policy if it does not receive payment after 30 days from the date on the original bill.

The letter is from a nonexistent insurance company, Free Insurance.

Example

Free Insurance

www.freeinsurance.org

One Premium Drive

Oklahoma City, OK 73112

(405) 866-4444

July 5, 2011

Mr. Stephen Tulloh

100 Maple Street

Columbia, SC 29205

Dear Mr. Tulloh:

You continue to have automobile insurance.

Free Insurance only mails a past-due notice if we have not processed a payment within three days after the date it was due.  Sometimes there is a delay in the delivery of a payment; less often a policy holder forgets to include his/her policy number or signature on a check.  When Free Insurance receives a check with all the necessary information, we promptly credit the account.

If Free Insurance does not receive a check within three days after the date the payment was due, the policy holder still has a 30-day grace period to pay the premium.  The policy holder receives a second notice informing him/her that we have not received a payment.  To keep his/her insurance operative, the policy holder only needs to stop payment on the first check and to send us another check.

Electronic maintenance of your account offers many benefits.  First, it guarantees immediate receipt of a payment.  Second, our well-trained agents can help you get any discounts (safe driver, good student, safety equipment, bundled policy, to list a few) for which you are eligible.  Third, you can make a claim electronically so that your agent can quickly and safely get you mobile again.  Fourth, you also will receive a check faster, usually within three weekdays.

During the current recession, your automobile, home and possessions are worth more.  You can protect them with a Free Insurance bundled policy.  Call John Doe at (803) 866-4444, and he will reveal how easy and affordable it is to be completely protected.  If you only want to insure a mobile device, a valuable collection, or a fine antique, John will help you do that, for his job is to serve you.

Whatever your insurance needs may be, Free Insurance will help you personally and personably.

Sincerely,

Jane Doe

Director, Customer Services

Explanation

What makes it an effective letter?  It opens with a positive statement that assures the reader.  The explanation of Free Insurance's policy is in the second paragraph.  The company does not assign blame, and the paragraph ends somewhat positively.  The writer positively presents the negative information in the third paragraph.  The second notice is not a threat; it is an announcement of a 30-day extension.  Because the writer suggests a way to resolve the problem, there is no need for further correspondence.  The writer, in the fourth paragraph, proposes another way to resolve the problem, presents additional benefits of computers, and includes some benefits of continual coverage by Free Insurance.  In the penultimate paragraph, the writer softly sells other policies the firm offers and prepares the reader for the close. 

Business Letters

When you write letters to people outside your organization, you will need to choose among three formats--block, modified block, and simplified--unless your organization has a standard format.  The following table reveals some of the differences among the three formats.

                                                 Block                   Modified Block                 Simplified
Spacing after letterhead            2 to 6 spaces        2 to 6 spaces                    2 to 4 spaces
Date and signature                   Left margin           1/2" to 2/3" from              Left margin
                                                                                left margin
Salutation and close                  Yes                       Yes                                    No
Subject line                               Optional               No                                    Yes
Paragraphic indentations           No                       Optional                           No        
Paragraphic spacing                  Single space         Single space                       Single space
                                                    between               between                            between
Lists                                          Indent                  Indent                               Left margin     

Your company may require you to use letterhead, stationary imprinted with the organization's name, logo, and contactual information.  If a letter is longer than one page, use letterhead only for the first page.  Use a heading--reader's name, the date, and page number--on each page after the first.

If the letterhead extends all the way across the top of the page, set your margins even with the ends of the letterhead.  Otherwise, your left margin should be from 1 inch to 1-1/2 inches wide, and your right margin should be from 5/8 of an inch to 1 inch wide.

Some companies use envelopes with windows so that the inside address (the reader's name and address) on the letter is visible for delivery.  If your organization uses such, adjust your margins so that the entire inside address is visible.

Use the same level of formality in the salutation, or greeting, as you would when speaking to somebody via phone: Dear John if you know the reader well and Dear Mr. Smith if you do not know the reader well enough to use his/her first name.  If you do not know the reader's name, omit the salutation.  However, readers like to see their names.  Writers who use the simplified format, which omits the reader's name in the salutation, frequently use the reader's name in the first paragraph.

With mixed punctuation, which is traditional, a colon follows the salutation, and a comma follows the close.  With open punctuation, which is becoming standard in electronic mail, omit all punctuation after the salutation and the close.  Sincerely and Yours truly are standard complimentary closes.  An informal close--Cordially, Thank you, Ciao--is acceptable when you are writing to a friend, to a business acquaintance, or to people in special groups.

Subject lines are optional in letters.  If you create one, ensure it is specific, concise and relative.  A good subject line will reveal the essence of the letter, will be short, and will correlate to the purpose and content of the letter.  If you do not want to include a subject line, create a reference line that refers either to the number--an account, for example--in previous correspondence or to the number--an order or invoice--on which the letter focuses.  (For more information on subject lines, please refer to the post "Electronic Mail.")

With respect to the body of a positive or neutral letter, in the first paragraph state any good news and summarize the primary points.  Include the date a policy begins, the percent of a discount, et cetera.  If the message is a response to an issue, reveal that it is such.

Next, provide details.  Do not repeat information that you have stated; rather, answer any questions the reader is likely to have.  Present details in the order of importance to the reader.  If there is any negative information, present it as positively as possible.  A policy may have limits; information may be incomplete; the reader may need to satisfy requirements.  Clarify such negatives, presenting them as positively as possible.

Letters to customers or potential customers sometimes include a sales paragraph promoting products or services the organization offers in addition to the product or service about which the reader asked.  Such promotions should be soft, not aggressive.

Not all letters require reader benefits.  Include reader benefits when you are presenting policies, when you want to shape the reader's attitude, or when the benefits may not be obvious to the reader.  When you present reader benefits, clearly state the advantages to the reader.  (For more information on reader benefits, please refer to the post "Reader Benefits.")

Tactfully concluding a letter can be problematic if it is short.  You can tell your reader what specific action you want him/her to take; you can compliment the reader for an action he/she took; you can describe a reader benefit; you can look forward to something positive that relates to the subject of the letter.  If you have omitted backing (grounds in detail), you can state where your reader can find more information.  If you have provided all the information your reader requires, you can write a goodwill ending that refers directly to the reader or to the reader's organization.

A goodwill ending should focus on the professional, not personal, relationship you have with the reader.  An effective ending specifically refers to the reader to the extent it would not correlate to someone else or to another person with the same title in another organization.  If you are writing to an individual in another organization, the ultimate paragraph can refer to your organization's relationship with the reader's organization.  When you are writing to a group, your ending should apply to the entire group.

With respect to a negative letter, tone (the implied attitude of the author toward the subject and the reader) is especially important.  Carefully edit your letter for positive emphasis and you-attitude.  The timing of a letter can convey tone.  An immediate response will suggest that the rejection did not receive much consideration; a negative letter immediately before a holiday will seem harsh.  When you need to relate negative information, consider recasting it as a positive or neutral message.  For example, if your organization has a problem, ask the reader(s) to help solve it.  If the negative information will lead directly to a reader benefit, organize the information as you would in a positive or neutral message.  When there is a reason a reader will understand or accept, state the reason before the refusal.  A strong reason will prepare the reader to expect the refusal.  State the refusal or negative information only once and as clearly as possible.  The reader may miss an inconspicuous refusal, making it necessary for you to say no a second time.  Present an alternative if there is one.  An alternative not only will provide the reader another way to get what he/she wants, but it also will suggest you care about him/her, via helping the reader meet his/her needs.  Close with a positive, forward-looking statement.

A document that accompanies a letter is an enclosure.  Whatever it may be--a note, a report--ensure that you refer to it in the body of the letter.  The enclosure line, which is after the writer's typed name, reminds the person who seals the letter to include the enclosure.  Use the abbreviation Encl. before the description or title of the document(s).

If you are sending copies of your letter to other people and you want to signal such to the primary reader, list their names after your typed name.  The abbreviation cc means computer copy, and the abbreviation c means copy.  If you are sending copies of your letter to other people and you do not want to signal such to the primary reader, do not list their names.  Such copies are blind copies.  List the names of the other people, with the abbreviation bc preceding the names, only on the copy you will file.